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Q: Is that you flipping me off in the banner?

As a matter of fact, intrepid explorer, it is.

Q: …you seriously used a picture of yourself giving the one fingered salute for your blog banner?

Hey, it’s a good picture of me. One of the best, and taken by a very good friend. It also pretty much sums up how our relationship is going to go if you keep asking me stupid questions.

Q: Well fine. Who the hell are you anyway and why are you telling me about books?

I’m a white female twenty something with a degree in writing and literature and not much to do with it. I like to read. I go beyond voracious into intervention-worthy addiction. I have, as you have gathered, many thoughts on the books I read. Since this is the age of the almighty internet, I am abusing the blogosphere to bring you my highly recommended and not at all biased opinions on the written word.

Q: Wait. So that degree means you can clog up my internets talking about actual words?

First off, it’s not your internet. Secondly, my degree just means I spend a lot of time playing with and creating with words. They are a favorite thing of mine. You cannot be a good writer if you don’t read, I don’t care what NaNoWriMo has taught you. I’m not flashing my education, I’m using it the way you’re supposed to use it, as a tool to further my learning.

Q: Are you always this confrontational?

You should meet me in person.

Q: Alright, alright. So what kind of books are you going to review here?

All kinds. Of course the books I review are limited greatly to my tastes, but if you feel like there is a book I should absolutely read, then give me its title, author, and publication year. I’ll do my best. Expect a lot of novels and maybe some memoir. I don’t delve too deeply into poetry because I’ve always felt that a poet knows it best, and a poet I am not.

Q: Are you going to be reviewing Twilight, Vampire Diaries, or any other popular fiction?

Vampires are Not Allowed. Twilight has gotten far too much attention from the literary world as it is, and I’m sure there are thousands of reviews floating around the internet that you can read and possibly troll. Not to say that I won’t be reading books considered pop lit- the Girl With The Dragon Tattoo and its sequels are sitting on my shelf, after all.

Q: not a fan of vampires, huh?

Anything that views you as a walking Gatorade should not be considered for any kind of romantic entanglement, heavy mormon overtones or not.

Q: Oh god are you one of those snotty literati hipster bitches?

No. the snotty literati hipster bitches spend way too much money on espresso and have a thing for indie cinema. Besides that, I can’t fit into any of their artfully ripped vintage store jeans. I like what I like, and I hate what I hate. That isn’t to say that I can’t change my mind, but I have strong opinions on what books like Twilight have done on a cultural, moral, and educational level. I believe that if a book hasn’t changed me by the time I close it, then it isn’t all that enjoyable.

Q: You’re one of those people that hates all popular writing, aren’t you?

Not at all. On the contrary- and covered over in Necessary Evils- I feel that pop lit and merit lit are both incredibly important to society as a whole, and sometimes are one in the same. They’re like two sides to a coin. One makes no sense without the other. There are pop lit books and authors I think are being lazy and doing all they can to fool readers into accepting their brilliance, but considering how much money That Asshole Nicholas Sparks makes, and how much I don’t make, there’s not much I can do to convince the braindead populace otherwise.

Q: So do you update with any sort of regularity?

Unfortunately, no. I’ve recently moved from my hometown in New Hampshire to an apartment with a good friend in Maryland. This means jobhunting and eating lots of spaghettios, which leaves little time for reading and writing about reading. I’ll take the time where I can, but I’ll never be on the cutting edge of just released books, I don’t have the budget for it.

Q: Can I follow you on my twitter/facebook/other inane device which allows me to pretend at an existence with my friends and family while really ignoring them for the solitude of a loveless machine?

If you really feel the need you can find me on twitter as GreeneKangaroo. I only have one facebook and that’s my personal one. If you’re so incredibly interested in me that you actually find it, I might question whether or not someone put something in your morning cheerios.

Q: Can I quote you in my blog/journal?

If you feel the need, for whatever reason- and being a douche is allowed, I hardly think I’ll bother stopping you- then please note where you got the quote from, or at least ping me back so I get traffic. That’s only fair.

Q: What kind of a name is ‘The Library At The End Of The Internet”?

The blog title is a reference to a manuscript I wrote, titled “The Library At The End Of The World.” I wanted to change it. All of my workshop mates told me I had no choice in the matter. The title won out- though by a thin margin- over “Bears Are Godless Reading Machines”. I still like that one. you can’t have it.

Q: You know for someone trained in literature you sure do swear a lot.

That’s not a question, fucker. Yes, I do swear extensively. I try to limit it, sometimes with more success than other times. Swearwords lose power the more often they are said, until they become about as interesting as words like ‘juice’ or ‘keyhole’. Remember, kids. A little fuck goes a long way.

Q: So, typos?

They happen. I’m not out to be grammatically or phonetically correct all the time. That’s just exhausting. I do, however, try to make everything legible.

Q: What’s up with the (A) and (D)?

A means the author is alive. D means deceased. I’m very bad at playing the ‘living or dead’ game, so I figured it made the most sense to inform you beforehand.

Q: You know, I haven’t seen an A or a D on every review…

I often forget my review setup. This means sometimes the publisher and author are switched around, I completely forget the translator, etc. I try my hardest to go back and correct those mistakes when I find them, but if it’s bugging you that much give me a shout out.

Q: Okay, so why the page count?

Each edition of a book is a little different. I include page counts because it helps the reader decide when or if they have time to read the book. Also, I like seeing the amount of pages. It makes me feel accomplished. Don’t judge me.


3 responses »

  1. Boy, you are QUITE venomous, aren’t you? Little viper. Or should I say… Nile Crocodile?

  2. Ah, that tongue of yours could cook bits of oven! Love this place already. I’ll be haunting it like Fred.


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